Ice Age: Dawn of the Dinosaurs - The third movie in a trilogy whose only real redeeming quality is the prehistoric squirrel. But who am I to judge, if you liked the first two, you’ll probably like this one. Also available in 3D.
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Public Enemies - Michael Mann (Heat, Collateral) directs Johnny Depp as the infamous gangster, John Dillinger. Also stars Christian Bale and Marion Cotillard (La Vie en Rose), but in a surprise move, the soundtrack contains not a single track from Audioslave. I’m always up for a Michael Mann movie.
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Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen - You may have heard of this one, it’s about a bunch of giant robot cars set on world domination and the giant robot cars trying to stop them. Oh, and there’s some humans mixed in there, namely Shia LeBouf and Megan Fox. Oh, and some explosions too … lots and lots of explosions. It is a Michael Bay flick after all. Came out today. Watch it in IMAX. Portions were filmed in IMAX on 70mm film (standard film is 35mm, IMAX doubles that and turns the picture on its side, making the picture 9 times larger than your standard release … I told you, giant robots), and let’s face it, if you’re going to spend all that money on the theater, you might as well get the biggest robots you can. This has turned into the largest description in the history of This Week in Movies. Michael Bay would be proud. BOOM.
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My Sister’s Keeper - I haven’t heard anything about this one, but it stars Cameron Diaz, so I wouldn’t watch it with your eyes.
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The Pink Panther 2 - Poor, poor Steve Martin. Let’s not encourage him. Maybe then he’ll go back to guest spots on 30 Rock instead of making Pink Panther 3.
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Inkheart - Brendan Fraser reads books to his daughter and guess what, it comes to life. I think this one may be based on a book of some sort, but I’m way to uninterested to look it up.
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Past Video Releases of Note:
Gran Torino - Clint Eastwood directs Clint Eastwood as a crotchety old man who learns to love his punk kid neighbors. It looks really good despite my lame description, but I have a platonic man-crush on Clint Eastwood, wrinkles and all.
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The International - Clive Owen and Naomi Watts go to war against a national bank. It got mediocre reviews, but looks like a fun enough rent.
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Kyle Terry is DrChocolate and my good friend from college who I asked to help me out with my movie reviews. My budget limits the amount of movies I can see and the good Dr, while having similar taste in movies as me, often has differing viewpoints that I think will be valuable to the site.
Whiz-bang fizz pop. That’s where director McG excels, and he shows it in Terminator Salvation with many many dogfights, fistfights, and gunfights. I’m sure anybody reading this knows the Terminator back story, so I’ll skip it and dive right in: McG, he of the infinitely vexing moniker, actually acquits himself quite well to the Terminator material and luckily for him, the parts that seem destined to spin off into la-la land are saved by an effectively gritty Christian Bale. The action scenes pop and move furiously, but not without a sense of purpose. They, barely I’ll admit, transcend the Michael Bay action-for-actions-sake vortex, but they plunge, swerve, and explode on a grand scale and are generally effective because you care about the cast. As mentioned, I think McG needs to graciously thank his cast for keeping this movie in line. The performances from Bale and Anton Yelchin as a young Kyle Reese are particularly good. Newcomer Sam Worthington is charismatic as a mysterious outsider (although the previews completely spoiled why he’s mysterious), this despite that fact that he doesn’t do much but glower and fight, though I believe that’s more the scripts fault than his. Bryce Dallas Howard is a victim of the screen writing as well; her role seems ancillary and underwritten. The entire Terminator saga has not come without its fair share of clunky, brick heavy dialogue and some poorly manufactured emotion and this installment is no exception in that department either. However, I ended up liking this movie far more than I thought I would. Recommended for a weekend of surprisingly well-made whiz-bang fizz pop.
The Hangover - Four friends go to Vegas for a bachelor party and wake up the next day with alcohol induced amnesia. Mike Tyson ensues.
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Land of the Lost - Will Ferrel remakes a 70s camp-fest with expected results. Be sure to watch him on Man vs. Wild, Thurs. June 4 on Discovery channel.
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My Life in Ruins - Nia Vardalos (Big Fat Greek) is a tour guide in Greece who is unhappy with life. I can’t tell if this is supposed to be a sequel or not. I can tell it’s going to be 2 hours of Greek-flavored poo.
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On Video:
He’s Just Not that Into You - Marketed as a romantic comedy that really understands women and their woes. In reality, it’s directed by the 51-year-old married male director of such gems as License to Wed, The Beautician and the Beast, and Dunston Checks In … Oh, and Sesame Street’s Follow That Bird. That movie changed my life.
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Defiance - James Bond organizes a rag-tag rebel army to fight the Nazis. Sounds like Return of the Jedi with less Ewoks.
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Revolutionary Road - Sam Mendes (American Beauty, Road to Perdition) directs Leo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet as they battle through the struggles of marriage. Looked pretty good.
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Up - Pixars latest. That should be all you need to know about this one to get you rushing to the theater.
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Drag Me to Hell - Sam Raimi’s (Spiderman, Army of Darkness) triumphant return to horror. Remember that scene in Spiderman 2 where Doc Ock attacks the doctors? Imagine that, but 2 hours long. Awesome.
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On Video:
Sorry folks, nothing worth renting this week. Go to the theater.
I just launched a new website designed to help the completely uninitiated with all their technological woes. The idea is to answer anyone’s questions about anything from computers to home theaters to working with ITunes and more. So spread the word, and if you have any questions or need any help, head on over to http://www.afrowhitey.com and drop me a line!
Dance Flick - Spoof of movies like Step Up … as if they needed spoofing. On the plus side, it’s not from the Scary Movie guys. On the minus side, it is from the Wayans.
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Paul Blart: Mall Cop - Watching this movie would be a slap to my face. I’m not even going to give you a link to Netflix.
Valkyrie - Tom Cruise is a Nazi. Or at least he plays one in this movie, kind of. He’s trying to kill Hitler. It looks fun, and I heard good things, so it’s in the queue.
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Fanboys - Star Wars geeks find out their friend may die before Episode I comes out, so they hatch a plan to break into Skywalker Ranch to steal a print. Now if only someone could travel back in time to tell them not to waste their time, it will only break his heart. You hear me, George Lucas?! YOU BROKE MY HEART!!! … Looks funny enough.
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Angels & Demons - Tom Hanks in the sequel to The DaVinci Code, which is based on the book that came out before The DaVinci Code. Confused? Better call Tom Hanks. At least he cut his hair this time. I’m skipping it, but if you liked the first one, you probably already have tickets to this one.
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The Brothers Bloom (Limited) - Adrien Brody, Mark Ruffalo, and Rachel Weisz in a con movie directed by the guy that did Brick. If this movie is even half as good as Brick, I’m getting in line now.
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