LukeStay.com

In Theaters:

• Babylon AD – XXX goes to the future. I know almost nothing about this movie. That means it’s got to be good, right?
• College – High School seniors go on a college tour, stupidity ensues. The tag line says it’s outrageous.
• Disaster Movie – Disastrous.
• Traitor – Don Cheadle is a traitor … or is he? This one actually looks decent, but I’ll probably still wait for rental.

On Video:

• What Happens in Vegas – I’ll tell you what happens in Vegas, we don’t rent this movie. That’s what happens in Vegas.
• Redbelt – David Mamet makes a movie about mixed martial arts. Could be good, but I don’t think I’ll bother.
• Son of Rambow – A bunch of kids try to reenact First Blood scene for scene. It got mixed reviews, but it still looks like fun.
• Where in the World is Osama Bin Laden – The guy from Super Size Me goes on a hunt. This guy’s about as full of himself as he is of Big Macs.

In Theaters:

• Death Race – Jason “the Driver” Statham is sentenced to drive fast cars with guns fast in prison. It’s a remake … of awesomeness.
• The House Bunny – Anna Faris is a washed-up Playboy Bunny who takes a bunch of pretty girls in bad makeup and ugly clothes and teaches them how to strip for the boys attention. It’s an uplifting tale for the whole family. Based on true events (in the dreams of adolescent boys across the world).
• The Longshots – Ice Cube is a washed up High School football star who coaches his niece’s Pop Warner team in an effort to prove to girls around the world that they have to play with the boys to get anywhere in the world.
• The Rocker – Do not watch this movie. I don’t care how much you like The Office or Dwight Schrute. This movie is nothing more than a ploy to make the world a whole lot stupider. This movie has been proven to cause de-evolution. You have been warned.

On Video:

• Prom Night – Some dude kills a bunch of whiny teenagers on Prom night.
• Street Kings – Keanu plays a cop. Whoa.
• Miss Pettigrew Lives for a Day – Frances McDormand is a washed-up nanny who accidentally becomes Amy Adams’ assistant. This one doesn’t look half bad, despite my lame tag line. I’m sure Megan already put it in the queue.